The INFP-INTJ relationship can be very rewarding if the couple can learn to overcome some serious differences in the way that each partner views what a relationship should be.
It can be difficult for both the INFP and the INTJ personality types to find an ideal romantic partner in the first place. The INFP is looking more for a soul mate and has an idealized vision of what this means. The INTJ has high standards that may not be able to be met by a mere mortal.
When these two personality types do come together, their styles can be complementary, allowing each person to grow and expand his or her horizons.
A Firm Foundation to Work With
Because these types are both introverts, they understand the need for a partner to have time alone. This couple will give each other the necessary space to explore their own ideas and possibilities. However, it’s important that this couple makes time to spend together to keep the relationship alive.
The INFP and the INTJ personalities both enjoy a cast array of interests, giving them plenty of opportunity to share experiences together. On the other hand, they can spend time at home together in the same room without saying a word and will both find comfort and satisfaction.
Although it might be difficult to find a common ground when these two personalities first meet, once a connection has been established, they will find that they both have a similar way of processing their thoughts and of analyzing the world around them.
Each of these personality types wants to make a positive change in the world. While they may go about it differently as individuals, this shared goal can be one of the issues that keeps these two working together though life.
Since both of these personality types don’t really tolerate some of the mundane tasks of daily life, they can find new and creative ways to explore their world together, but it’s important that they both sacrifice a little to ensure daily tasks get accomplished.
When it comes to making a relationship work, both the INFP and the INTJ personality types are willing to give their all and to come up with creative ways to keep the fires burning.
Ways INFPs and INTJs Complement Each Other
Both of these personalities are intuitive rather than sensing. This means that they may enjoy lots of time exploring possibilities together. Since the INFP always looks for what could be, the INTJ partner can draw this individual back to reality and offer a more realistic scenario.
The INTJ personality type needs a partner who will listen and explore ideas together, which is great because the INFP loves to listen and can provide additional possibilities while keeping the INTJ from focusing down too narrowly on one position.
Conversations may never be dull in the INFP-INTJ relationship. Each of these individuals enjoys analyzing everything from real situations to extravagant potentialities though the INTJ tends to remain more down-to-earth than the INFP.
As the INFP personality type wants an authentic relationship and to get to know the real person inside, this individual can help to bring out the often reserved personality style of the INTJ. The INTJ can become more fulfilled knowing that the INFP will accept this person as he or she is.
The INTJ personality type is typically much more logical and rational than their INFP counterpart. This can help the INFP to stay more level-headed and grounded when making decisions while the INFP can help the INTJ to see a decision’s impact on people.
Challenges They May Face
Although both the INFP and the INTJ prefer introverted feeling and extraverted thinking, these functions are opposite in strength for these personality types, which can be a source of contention during various phases of the relationship.
Introverted feeling comes first for the INFP personality types. Someone of this type may wear his or her heart on the sleeve while the INTJ partner may find this individual too wishy-washy at times.
In the alternative, extraverted thinking is key for the INTJ. Logic tends to prevail, and feelings may be difficult for this individual to understand or be concerned with.
Since the INTJ is more organized, he or she may want a shared living environment to be arranged a specific way though the INFP is much more laid back so may not care so much about this.
The INTJ personality type may feel like the INFP partner has his or her head in the clouds too much. The idealistic viewpoints of this person may seem unrealistic at times, and this can be irritating to the more rational approach of the INTJ.
Consequently, the INFP individual may feel that the INTJ partner is too rigid and structured because of this individual’s need for schedules and organization. Additionally, the INTJ partner may seem a bit too detached emotionally while the INFP needs that deep, feeling connection.
Tips for the INFP-INTJ Couple
Whereas the inherent values of each of these personalities may differ, specifically between the importance of feeling and thinking, learning where the other person is coming from will go a long way toward keeping this relationship alive and fulfilling for both parties.
For the INFP:
- Appreciate the INTJ’s need for structure, and try to stick with plans and be on time.
- Try not to take the INTJ’s comments too personally. Remember, this person is coming from a logical, thinking perspective.
- Know that the INTJ may not be as open to expressing his or her feelings but may show love in more practical or logical ways.
- Attempt to look at differences from a more logical perspective rather than focusing on your feelings all of the time.
For the INTJ:
- Try to be more flexible and spontaneous when your INFP partner has ideas.
- When discussing important matters, consider the INFP’s feelings as this individual is coming from a more feeling and sensitive perspective.
- When encouraging the INFP, try not to micromanage his or her time. This person needs a lot of flexibility to get things done.
- Learn to be more open with your feelings since this is of utmost importance in a relationship for the INFP.