Enneagram 1 and 3 Relationship
Are you interested in the Enneagram 1 and 3 relationship? This guide is for you!
Enneagram Type 1 – A Moralist Perfectionist
Judge, Keeper of Rules, Crusader, Desires High Quality, Reformist, Administrator
Enneagram Type 3 – The Successful Achiever
Ace performer, highly charismatic, motivational presence, role model, Best of the best, Idealist
Core Pattern
Ones belong to the gut triad, which places more emphasis on excellence.
Their attention to detail sometimes makes them seem in areas of high judgementalism and unrealistic perfectionism, but this only happens in extreme cases.
They have high standards that can be difficult to meet.
Enneagram Type Threes are goal-oriented, positive people who are efficient and self-directed.
Unfortunately, they are known to sacrifice quality to acquire more, making quantity their objective.
Their personalities can change to help them fit in with those surrounding them.
Shared Values
Both Type Ones and Type Threes value being able to take action about the issues that mean the most to them.
They value merit and want to be the best version of themselves.
Goals remain the highest priorities for Types One and Threes, and both value excellence.
These two types are very disciplined and have strong work ethics and habits.
They are both skilled in the ability to place their personal feelings in the background if being about to achieve goodness is a possibility.
Progress is also an essential aspect of their being.
When faced with complex issues, both put straightforward communication at the forefront.
These two types are people who tend to follow through on whatever they start.
How Type One and Type Three Complement One Other
Type Ones and Type Threes are filled with energy and enthusiasm for their work.
Each is a committed, compulsive, and hard worker who works well in unison.
As a couple, their standards are similar, and are both willing to forget their personal needs in the name of accomplishing their work goals and objectives.
As a result, this pairing can achieve phenomenal results.
Their dedication, keen focus, and mastery can produce whatever goals they set out to achieve on the condition that they work together.
Type Ones fit well with Type Threes because they have what it takes to make their partners feel more realistic and grounded.
Threes, on the other hand, expand themselves and go “outside the lines” to show Ones how to be more creative and to relax in their continual judgmental dialogue.
Each party in this couple knows how to help the other make a difference.
The positive, can-do attitude of Type Threes is a real asset to the lives of Type Ones, who struggle in this area.
Conversely, Type Threes appreciate the conscientiousness possessed by Ones.
They feel secure in their ability to ensure correctness, high standards and integrity, and commitment to achieving excellence when they seek to improve anything.
Ones and Threes are in unison with their mutual expectations, determination to do well, high standards, and productivity.
They tend to branch off from others and rely solely upon each other.
Both Threes and Ones have trouble allowing others to take the lead.
They operate from the stance that if one wishes a job to be done correctly, he or she must do it personally.
As a team, each knows the precise role to take to accomplish an objective with excellence.
How a One and Three Pairing Can Get Into Trouble
While a Type One and Type three pairing is powerful and can move metaphorical mountains, the combination can also be brutal.
As a couple, their expectations and high standards are extreme, and when compounded by their relationship, things can turn bitter, and anger can reign.
They are a high-strung match, to say the least, willful and proud.
The strength of their convictions and perfectionism means that they can go wrong in a major way when things go wrong.
Each party can blame the other, becoming accusatory and harsh towards one another.
This tendency can even lead to the demise of the relationship. When things are favorable, they are the picture of strength as a couple.
When they go wrong, the bond quickly weakens.
Type Threes can seem infuriating to Type Ones, especially when they make last-minute changes based on circumstantial events.
It causes Ones to question Type Three’s trustworthiness, which has the effect of causing Type Threes to view them as picky, ensconced in detail, and judgmental.
Threes have to keep a fast pace, or they are not happy.
Ones abhor this and do not hold back when expressing their displeasure.
Neither party in this couple can be completely straightforward nor forthcoming about their feelings.
They deflect by reacting angrily, pointing their fingers at one another, and disengaging from the other person for prolonged periods.
When they fight, cold, perfunctory stalemates occur that can be detrimental to their relationship, and that has the power to bring it to a halt completely.
What Each Type Needs To Be Aware Of
Threes work better when they have dominion over their projects because they like to take credit beyond their actual due.
Ones need to be aware of their partner’s need for adulation about work.
Threes are more concerned with their success than virtually anything else. They need recognition.
Threes tend to forget that Ones often participate in the success of Three’s projects and to be sure to acknowledge them in these areas.
This can be difficult for Threes because they can be hesitant to acknowledge anyone outside of themselves.
However, this is important for the sake of their relationships.
Enneagram Type Ones find it impossible to be taken for granted on any level because they feel it is ethically wrong.
This is why it is so important to the relationship that both people express their appreciation for the accomplishments of the other.
It is also important that each member of this couple be clear about one another’s roles, both in the relationship itself and in accomplishing tasks.
This can be difficult due to the hypercritical nature of both parties.
Ones should know that while Threes can appear confident and accomplished on the outside, they can be self-deprecating and insecure on the inside.
How a Type One and Type Three Couple can Support One Another
Type Threes can support Type Ones by helping them understand that perfect is an unrealistic concept.
Type Ones need help in this area, as they lack the positivity and lighthearted attitude necessary to increase their flexibility.
Type Threes should learn to slow down to respect Type One’s high standards.
Threes cut corners so they can achieve higher quantity, while Ones attend to every last detail so they can achieve higher quality.
Type Ones can support their Type Three partners by urging them to slow down enough to attend to details instead of rushing through projects (and life in general).
Ones can also support their Three partners by adhering to a high standard when Threes show a more relaxed attitude.
Both Type One and Type Three should commit to having some lighthearted fun now and again to enjoy the fruits of their labor. This can help strengthen their union exponentially.
Conclusion
A pairing between a Type One and a Type Three combines two power sources to result in self-confidence and dedication.
Each party knows how to utilize his or her talents to make the other proud. Mutual admiration is at the heart of a Type One-Type Three union.
Their approaches to life and work are very different, as one partner is detail-oriented while the other cuts corners to accomplish more.
This combination of traits can work in unison to create greater strength in their convictions, or it can work against them by drawing out their worst traits.
A Type One-Type Three pairing has the potential to be enormously strong both while at work and at play.
Should their pride, the true source of their problems, knock them off track, tempers can flare, and it can take each party a considerable amount of time to get back on and move forward.
This pairing can result in a volatile couple, but one that is so tremendously in tune with the other that they can often go for years without a temper flair-up.
Both tend to rely upon their union and cut other people out of their lives altogether.
It is the job of the Type One person involved with a Type Three individual to help their partner think more clearly and to help that person be more grounded.
On the other hand, Threes should strive to help Type Ones lose their rigid tendencies and explore new areas.
Ones and Threes tend to bond over the issues that matter to them personally, which usually seem to focus on how to impact the world positively.
If any couple has the potential to make a positive impact on the world, it is this personality combination.
They are strong, know how to do a job correctly, and are focused on doing a good job.
So long as each party in this union gives the other person what is missing from his or her personality, things should run like a well-oiled machine.
However, if either fails to offer support and admiration in recognition of a job done by the other party, the potential for disaster will rear its ugly head.
The Type One-Type Three power couple is the couple that can make a huge difference in the world.
These couples are destined for greatness and usually accomplish exactly that, so long as each strives to understand the other, and they, as a couple, keep the lines of communication open at all times.
Their energy for making the world a better place is obvious.
