Enneagram 4 and 6 Relationship

Are you interested in the Enneagram 4 and 6 relationship? This guide is for you!

Type 4 – The Romantic Maverick

Dramatic, tragedy-driven in romance, dreamer, aesthetic oriented, humanitarian, unique

Type 6 – The Loyal Keeper

Skeptical, guardian, Devil’s advocate, trooper, the detector of trouble, defender of rights

Core Patterns

Types 4 and 6 compose the triads of the heart and head, respectively.

Types 4 wear their hearts on their sleeves and are empathetic in that they take on the emotional burdens of the rest of the world while also feeling pain and joy at great depth within themselves.

Type 6s enjoy camaraderie, so these are compatible traits.

Type 4s can be dramatic and often feel misunderstood, while Type 6s proceed with caution yet have a less dramatic approach to life.

Type Fours have a deep appreciation of beauty, while Type 6s place various noble causes at the front lines of their attention span.

The typical enneagram Type Four individual can commonly find him or herself amid an identity crisis. In contrast, the Type Six individual values predictability and has a strong sense of self.

Shared Values

Even though there are some distinct differences between enneagram Types four and Six, they do share many traits that can enhance their relationships.

Both are characterized as being loyal to the people and causes that are meaningful to them. Both value creativity as well.

While Type Fours are noted as being drama kings or queens, Type Sixes can also have strong reactions to people and situations.

Both types appreciate friendliness and experience vulnerability on an emotional level. It is important to both types that they maintain solid social connections, and they strive to do so.

Fours and Sixes value the love of family, and both attempt to create a harmonious aesthetic in their homes and lives.

Both have playful, friendly sides, and both share a distaste for unpredictability. Both Type Fours and Type Sixes dislike being obligated to others’ expectations, definitions or standards, yet both allow it to happen repeatedly.

How Type Fours and Type Sixes Complement One Another

Type Sixes and Fours tend to be highly emotional and feel insecure around others.

This is especially true when they find themselves in the presence of those with whom they don’t have close friendships.

They can be driven, at times, by their anxiety in ways that others may view as extreme.

Fours and Sixes are deeply in tune with their inner instincts and can act quickly on their intuitive urges without even thinking about it.

Sixes are known to have the same general appearance or the same manner of dress as Fours.

They can sometimes even misidentify themselves as the same type as their Four partners because they tend to process personal emotions similarly.

Their common characteristics can lead to closer connections with one another. They feel more bonded than other pairs and tend to be more attached.

Each seems to have a profound understanding of the emotional network possessed by the other.

Sixes love to feel needed, and Fours make certain that they know who they are in terms of the important roles that they play in Four’s lives.

This provides satisfaction and fulfillment for Sixes’ urges to be caretakers, which means a lot to them because this is a primary way in which Sixes quell their own anxiety.

While Sixes can possess a lot of self-doubts, they feel more confident when cast in the caretaker role.

Generally speaking, the sense of playfulness possessed by the Type Six enneagram personality and the whimsical side that Type Fours often display makes for a fun couple that is balanced and open to new discoveries.

Even though Type Six individuals possess playfulness, they are firmly grounded in the pragmatic.

While Fours can be all over the place with their intense emotionality, bawdy daring, and intense creativity.

This provides a good complement in which each person balances the other. Sixes seem to be born with a type of steadiness acquired more gradually by Type Fours.

Type Sixes are more introspective about taking action, but Fours are more consistent with their ability to move forward without much thought.

This urges Sixes ahead in situations where they can be found dragging their feet. Fours help Sixes overcome any emotional obstacles they may possess.

Sixes impart their warmth, charm, intellectual curiosity, and charm within the confines of their relationships with Fours.

Fours contribute their artistic tendencies, complementary assurance of authenticity, and a genuine sense of who they are to the relationship, and this combination contributes to a high platitude of tolerance and grace between the two types that plays on each’s prominent feelings of having been misunderstood, abandoned or rejected outright.

These shared feelings draw them toward one another in a more harmonious union.

Areas in Which Sixes and Fours Can Run into Problems

Both Sixes and Fours tend to be anxious types that can talk themselves into feeling negative emotional states where none existed previously.

This can lead to self-fueled beliefs in impending doom or catastrophes, which can fall straight into the arms of pessimism and fervid negative judging of themselves, one another, and things and people on the outside of relationships.

During these times, feelings of mistrust, which come naturally for Sixes, and feelings of alienation from the rest of society can begin a downward spiral lasting for days or weeks.

Neither of these personality types is fond of change or the potential for change, so this can spawn even more depressing pessimism.

While Fours aren’t necessarily into being overly adventurous, they do enjoy trying new things in moderation.

Sixes, on the other hand, can be downright resistant to change and to the willingness that Fours have to self-explore at even a snail’s pace.

The conservative reserve held by the Sixes can create conflict with their partners, who can view this as being held back by the Sixes.

The couple’s pessimism, mistrustful natures, and self-doubt can lead to misconceptions on both sides, which is not good for the relationship.

What Should Sixes Know About Fours and Vice Versa?

If each party of this couple can be aware that they both easily fall into negative thinking patterns and what causes them, it can help solve problems caused by this issue before it even begins.

Sixes and Fours will do themselves favors by watching for the signs in the other that this type of thinking is about to occur so that it can be stopped before it has the chance to spiral out of hand.

We often hear from both Fours and Sixes that their partners are not romantic enough or that they possess rigid thinking.

Sixes can view their Four Partners as being emotionally unstable or undependable and can insist that they are right all the time.

Fours can be equally as forthcoming with similar complaints about sixes. If each can head the other off and stir him or her back onto a more positive path, disaster can be avoided, and strong relationships can follow, often lasting for life.

Each party should know that the other is emotionally intense and handle the emotional situations that arise with great delicacy and concern.

Short fuses can ignite quickly unless a full understanding is possessed by each partner, and with that understanding, knowledge of what needs to be done to stop it. Continuous monitoring of these areas is necessary to keep the couple happy.

How Sixes and Fours Can Be Supportive of One Another

Sixes can be most supportive of their Four partners by enabling them that it is OK to be self-expressive so that they can infuse their work and lives with the creativity that pushes them toward meeting their goals.

Sixes can also strive to pay a lot of attention to Fours because this is what their partners crave most in their relationships.

The key is clear and concise communication that leaves no questions unanswered.

Fours can best support their Type Six partners by acknowledging their conservative nature and tendency toward foot-dragging when embracing change.

A gentle nudge, rather than an aggressive one, is what works best for Type Six and will be viewed quite favorably. It is the best way for Fours to move their Type Six partners toward any goal.


Enneagram personality Type Fours and Type Sixes possess the potential for a true understanding of one another at deep levels, which can lead to almost unheard-of levels of closeness.

They also possess the potential for true, empathetic understanding of one another in ways that other enneagram-type parings do not and cannot possess.

Together, these two personality types possess the power to help one another overcome emotional obstacles and get outside of their comfort zones and into areas they would probably never explore without the other person.

The road can be rocky between these two at first, but if each takes the time to get to know the other’s quirks, fears, and inhibitions, this knowledge can be used to turn instability into power.

The power can be used to improve their lives as a couple. Still, it can go far beyond those boundaries to have significant impacts as power couples, on their friends, their communities, and even in areas that can have global impacts.

Strong Type Four and Type Six pairings create the types of power couples that cause the rest of society to sit up and take notice.

When their power is used the right way, t

Enneagram Type 4 Compatibility with Other Types

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