Enneagram 4 and 8 Relationship

Are you interested in the Enneagram 4 and 8 relationship? This guide is for you!

Enneagram Type 4 – The Solo Romantic

Solitary, Mourns Lost Romance, Connoisseur, Humanitarian, Aesthetic Person, One-of-a-kind, Dramatic King or Queen

Enneagram Type 8 –  The Protective Challenger

Protector, Action Oriented, Champion, Revolutionary, Leading Commander, Reasoner, Take Charge Personality

Core Patterns

Fours belong to the triad that leads with the heart rather than the head.

They tend to be sensitive to the pain experienced by others in the world, as well as to their pain, which never really leaves. 

Type Fours are creators who appreciate a broad range of arts, from paintings to the art of conversation. 

It is a part of a Type Four’s personality to feel misunderstood by just about everyone. They can be very dramatic yet are compassionate and loving.  

Type Fours can feel insecure and crave recognition, both by their partners and by society in general. 

When the spotlight is on Type Four, he or she dawns on the crown of drama and becomes a royal king or queen. 

Type Eights are a decisive lot. They define the term, a “take charge” kind of person.  They tend to be action-oriented and have strong senses of justice. 

When they encounter a wrong, they attempt to right it.  Type Eights are always seeking a competitive advantage. 

As leaders, they are powerful, and rule with charisma and compassion, using their skills to fight for justice. 

They lend helping hands to society’s downtrodden, weak and underrepresented.

Type Eights love being independent and need to take charge of everything and everyone around them. 

They do not put their destinies in anyone else’s hands because they fear betrayal. They hate the very thought of being manipulated or controlled. 

They do not tolerate liars or anyone who might challenge their authority and can become intimidating should this occur.

When challenged, Type Eights are known for being insensitive and impatient. 

How Type Fours and Type Eights Can Support One Another

Type Fours and Type Eights both have strong capacities to love one another.  They can best support one another by looking to their acceptance of the things that each loves about the other, even if it feels uncomfortable to do so. 

Both types appreciate beauty and can nurture this appreciation and utilize it as a tool to support the other partner.

Type Fours and Type Eight both experience happiness in establishing connections and can support their prospective partners by expressing their joy and enthusiasm. 

They can also support one another by respecting each partner’s common craving for acceptance and times of solitude. 

They need space for personal reflection, yet to be supportive afterward, should share their findings with their partners in deep and forthcoming ways, leaving no stone unturned concerning details. 

Shared Values

Type Eights and Type Four enneagram personalities share many common values, such as how they face conflict and show compassion for others. 

Both of them love deeply and are arduous about emotional intensity.   

They each share the ability to accept others who are different from themselves and to connect with them emotionally. 

Rather than hide themselves away, they tend to open up to other people and to one another.

Their emotional intensity is shared using authentically expressing that which resides in the deepest recesses of their hearts. 

Each of these types brings drama into the relationship, but at different levels and for different reasons. Type Fours are connoisseurs of the finer things in life.

Type Eights have similar appreciation but are less intense about it, unless it concerns social justice. 

Type Eights and Type Fours both share strong instincts about life, and they share intense reactions to what goes on around them. 

They are both fast to act and have profound appreciation for clear and concise communication, deepfelt honesty, and their mutual love of the arts. 

How Type Fours and Type Eights  Complement Each Other

Type Fours and Type Eights comprise an incredibly close complement. 

They tend to quickly bond and feel deep care and concern for one another.

They are both intuitive types and can relate to one another easily, even though they have opposite dispositions.

Each has what the other needs, making each of the parts of a puzzle fit together perfectly most of the time. Fours and Eights relate to one another despite their differences. 

As Fours tend to feel misunderstood, Eights have ways of acknowledging and communicating with them that assure Fours that they are understood, at least by this type. 

Even as strident and powerful leaders, Type Eights contribute to their pariings with Type Fours with the acceptance that is non-confrontational, a rare trait for this type. 

Both Type Fours and Type Eights are undeniably talented and show great strength in their prospective areas. 

Each can support the other by looking to these times to give encouragement and love. 

Each can compliment the other by lavishing praise for all accomplishments and by informing people outside of their relationships about how competent he or her is. 

This can lead to important business and valuable social connections that can enhance the union. 

How Type Fours and Type Eights Can Get Into Trouble

Trouble can arise within this pairing when Type Eights overcome Type Fours with attention to detail and high expectations.

Type Fours take a much more relaxed attitude. 

While beauty is important to them, detailed neatness and keeping everything in its place are not. This can result in friction between a Type Four and Type Eight couple.

 As born leaders, Type Eights can have unrealistic expectations when it comes it affecting justice. 

Everything must seem fair to them. 

This can lead to problems with Type Fours regarding the day-to-day aspects of life.

Eights can feel overtaxed about maintaining a home, for instance, or about feeling that they work harder and make larger contributions to the relationship than Fours do. 

Their frustrations can blindside the Type Fours, who have no idea that things may be perceived as imbalanced by their Type Eight Partners. 

Type Eights tend to take a broader, more egalitarian approach to life in their quests for justice. 

Fours can begin to demand attention that Eights can consider unfair.  This can lead to discord and conflict, but it is usually short-lived and easy to resolve. 

What  Type Four and Type Eight Need To Be Aware Of

Unlike Type Fours, enneagram Type Eight personalities are drawn to projects fraught with challenges.

They love taking these opportunities to test their skill levels, and while they are doing this, their Type Four partners can feel high pressure to conform, compete or reorder their preferences and lives. 

Type Eights need to assure Type Fours that these phases are not about them and that they should not take them personally. 

Type Fours, on the other hand, need to choose their words carefully during these times, to let their Type Eight partners know of the stress these times put them through.  

Each person in a Type Four/Type Eight relationship seeks attention and accolades for their contributions, both to the relationship and life in general.  It is when Eights feel unappreciated that they can lash out in anger. 

Under the same circumstances, sensitive Four Types coil in pain and become sad and withdrawn.

If clear communication occurs during peaceful times, each will know not to be offended by the other’s actions in this regard.  

Type Eights need to know that they are appreciated by their Type Four partners, even during the times in which Type Fours become preoccupied with their drama.  Type

Fours need to be aware that the anger and lashing out on the part of their Type Eight partners is deeply ingrained into their personalities and that they should not take it personally.   

Each should be aware that the other needs random validation and praise regardless of the situation. 


There is no doubt that matches between Type Four and Type Eight enneagram personalities have the potential for deep and lasting attractions to one another. 

If things go off track, the intensity of both parties has the potential for emotional danger.

As a couple, they can be volatile, yet their compatibility leads each toward the other’s raw vulnerability and stormy temper. 

Both types view the other as people who possess the potential to move mountains, and each admires the other’s strengths but are less tolerant of one another’s weaknesses. 

Since both types have deep intuitive powers, they count on each other to activate that power when needed.  This is done by shared enthusiasm for life, love, and interaction with one another. 

Type Fours strength lies in his or her heightened awareness of his or her own and the deeper feelings of others. 

Eights have this as well but are also more keenly aware of any external phenomena that have the potential to affect their lives. 

As a couple, these two types can seem super-charged at times, almost as though they have the superhuman capacity to overcome any obstacles that stand in their way of achieving their goals individually or of their quest for happiness as a couple.  

Fours and Eights work together because Eights are so firm in their convictions as leaders, and Fours are firm in their convictions as admirers of their partners.

Hand-in-hand, they work together to build phenomenally-strong relationships that can last for entire adult lifetimes. 

They are high achievers and appreciate the finer things in life, which they share together for ample yet different reasons.

Type Eights and Type Fours signify power. 

Enneagram Type 4 Compatibility with Other Types

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